I wrote a book titled: “Trusting All That Is” . An outcropping of spiritual philosophy that places an emphasis on the empowerment of the individual and an immutable trust of a higher compassionate consciousness which secretly edges all sentience towards expansion.
However, there have been many times, since writing that book, that I have fallen for doubt — completely forgetting all I learned from previous spiritual masters and my own experience.
This is common state of being for most of humanity. Our trust with one another may be high within select groups or organizations, but on the whole, it is exceedingly low for those that are strangers. For instance, if you make an Airbnb account and desire to get an apartment for the night, you have to prove you are trustworthy enough, not to wreck the house. If you pass through airport security, there is checkpoint after checkpoint of identification protocols, scanning systems, and numerous guards that watch your every move. As it stands now, society does not trust free will.
This makes sense on one level, as our society is full of people who don’t care about playing by the rules. This doesn’t mean these people are evil or to be shunned, but usually indicates a history of unwilling coercion into a situation where they saw no other way out. Our collective distrust with one another will not heal by escalating our scrutiny, but only by escalating our understanding and love.
That said, I am clearly not at the pinnacle of trusting consciousness either. As was shown to me on my recent trip to the Ozarks. It was a pleasant trip but, all the while I had a secret anxiety that I did not want to admit to anyone. I leased a brand new car where I was constantly afraid that it would be damaged and was negatively assuming that it would be so.
On our way back home, my brother’s friend asked if he could drive the car. I was extremely nervous about this, and innately had no trust at all towards a fellow sentience, that obviously had no desire to wreck the car. Yet, something in me still couldn’t trust this. Trying to find a balance point, I said something along the lines of “Sure, so long as you face any of the financial consequences”.
Basically, my fear was projected at him and my words only relayed a traumatic distrust towards a fellow consciousness. Certainly, there are times when we need to trust our own intuition more than another, but far too often we starve for protection, insurances, security, and safety that only breeds further doubt and fear within the collective. It is the attitude of a constant need to control others and all situations. The same kind of perspective that creates any kind of fascist culture in a quick snap.
This again was reflected in a dream I recently had with an archetype that has similar qualities in our subconscious. I wrote about it here:
In the dream, there are people surrounded by a play pen. Within the play pen is a small familiar elder god child. Its appearance was extremely realistic and almost astral in form. I came close to it, and fed it something to eat. At that moment, I realized the potential of this creature. It seemed like it could easily turn evil. It gave me the feeling as though I would have to slay it in the future and it would be too powerful to do so.
Some say dreams are only experiences working themselves out on a soul level, then when we awaken, the mind interprets it how it wishes. Thus, the telling of any dream is like the telling of any experience in the waking world. The meaning is the same as the interactions that were had by the free will of those whose energy happened to meet.
Prior to this dream, I was in a chaotic state. My energy was much more challenging to control as I believed the universe had abandoned me on any real life guidance. I would hear screaming for no reason and voices that were rather demeaning to my soul. It was from this point I had to garner that universal trust again, by understanding that consciousness always evolves.
In this dark pit of concern, I realized that I had to be comfortable joining society once again, and not feeling as though this was a huge imposition within my life. Reminding myself of the Hanuman archetype with this quote: “Greater than God is God’s servant.”
I have found that my creative work has not allowed me to serve humanity in the way I wanted. Thus, I realized that there was no harm in being an average and humble servant. It is indeed the great majority of us that have to surrender into this role. Perhaps, one day my creative work will have a societal value, and then I can enjoy my day in the sun. Or maybe we will have some kind of disclosure and revolution in how our society structures itself. But, I have found it is useless to be irritated by whatever we decided to do in the past. In life, we can only say and do what our intuition has guided us to say or do in the moment. Step by step, until further realization.